The Alternative Line
by Joe Holzer for CNY-PCA Redline Report Copyright 2017
Two Redlines back you might recall I wrote about my beloved ’95 Porsche 993 Cabrio Tiptronic having a roof leak which filled the interior with water and caused the dash to light up like it was Christmas. The lying thief ingrate scumbag known as my landlord has continued with his dishonest ways which caused it to be locked from the garage for which I have paid, along with about $20K of other property of mine, for over a year now. Now, despite our having a written agreement since I first moved here and setup his fallow non-working farm like an RV Park so I could live from my motorhome, and the $10K I invested to make it that way two years after his house had burned to the slab, the cause of his inability to use the property for anything, he has just convinced a “Judge” that we had a “verbal agreement” since 9/1/16 whereby I owe him $600 per month in back rent. Most intriguing is that the “Judge” decided that MY evidence of a WRITTEN agreement which stipulated half that, plus my evidence that he had been stealing my electricity since June 2016 had absolutely no merit because he had no physical signature on that agreement, and that despite his having REFERRED to that agreement as basis for the lying thieving ingrate scumbag’s believing he owned my shed and infrastructure spending which enabled him to live here at ALL, but STRICTLY on the basis of his ASSERTION meant that we have a verbal contract with which I must comply.
HOW is it that
Sad, but true, I clearly found about the worst human being possible for a landlord. He also seems to like black whores, because he must be subletting his apartment while he is not in it, based on the number of different vehicles which show up here at all hours, never for more than an hour, and their coming and going wrapped in nothing but a robe. I will leave to you readers’ imaginations the details of THOSE arrangements.
And so I am being evicted as I write this, despite being prepaid for rent based on the terms of our ACTUAL agreement through spring 2019. I wondered aloud in the court, to no avail, who he would be stealing power from when I have the meter billed to ME removed by Nat’l Grid upon my departure, after the NYSP threatened ME with arrest if I disconnected HIM. And I have already removed all ability by him to have water from his well when the ground freezes, something I had done for ME when it froze during my first winter here subsequent to the agreement I THOUGHT was in place at the time. And while I can prove that all the rest of the infrastructure I installed is actually MINE by receipts if we had no agreement, that the “Judge” did not immediately recognize the paradox in his own assertion that the “utility central” shed I brought in the first place in Sept 2013 could not possibly be his under that agreement without the entire agreement being controlling, and that agreement says explicitly that the shed CONTINUES TO BELONG TO ME UNTIL I LEAVE OF MY OWN VOLITION, something any sane person would argue is clearly NOT the case in the current situation. But sanity and Oswego County Jurisprudence (now THERE’S an oxymoron ;-) have little in common with one another.
So by now you dear readers are wondering what possible connection any of this has to do with Porsches. I thank you for bearing with me on the back story, we are getting there, but it was useful for you to understand the “path to misery” which put me here. And, as usual, I digressed ;-)
After the flood inside the Cabrio, last October I arranged with a friend to trade my parking it in her garage for her use of my Tahoe1, the truck my landlord had borrowed in 2015 because I was a cooperative and generous guy who was trying to be helpful. You know, the kind who gets shafted by scam artists like Milt the Thief, who promptly drove it as if he owned it, putting over 2K miles per month on it while paying for NOTHING, including insurance, except his own gas, then left it abandoned along the side of the road where I had to ransom it when its fuel pump had a problem, but EXPECTED to use my Tahoe2 the same way. My denial of that absurdity was his reason for locking me from the barn I paid for.
Anyway… sorry for the usual digress ;-) So my friend made a great effort to dry out the interior of my cabrio while it languished in her garage all winter and spring. And it was with trepidation that I first turned the key last month to see whether any progress had been made on the Tiptronic, which you might recall was in “Limp Home” mode as a result of the water in the footwells which was drowning its control electronics. I am ecstatic to report that the transmission again shifts correctly, although its indicators on the dash are still not correct. The Tip has a typical PRND321 shift gate to the left, but with a “manumatic” fore-aft up and down shift respectively gate alongside to the right. So while the shifter actuates a physical cable to the transmission for the PRNDL functions, only electronic micro-switches sense the “manumatic” transfer, and those are sensed by electronics which have about a 0.050 inch isolation from one another on a card edge which would have been submerged, and so subjected to conductivity by the water, and likely precipitate conductivity once that was removed also. Which is evident from the extra indicator LEDs illuminated.
Left in “D” the indicator in the speedometer shows that on the left, but also points to the “3” on the right, something it SHOULD do only if the “manumatic” gate has been selected by moving the shifter into that plane. And that should show the “2”, or even the “1” if stomped hard on the launch, before shifting up. And those changes do not indicate reliably, yet clearly the gearing they represent is in fact being actuated, the best news. So I’ll likely have to clean the electronics, but it seems the transmission will not be a MUCH more costly repair bill. And it otherwise drives as before the water issue.
The actual roof, however, has HUNDREDS of micro-tears indicative of the top fabric being beyond its usable life. And with the other hassles I have to deal with right now, replacing that en-toto is not in the cards currently. So I found a fabric which closely matches the original pattern appearance, and I used a flexible adhesive to overlay large patches to spread the support and reduce the high stress areas of the OEM fabric, as well as (hopefully, anyway ;-) seal up the area where it leaked through in October, creating a means that will channel water away from where it had leaked through the roof. And the roof still operates to open and close correctly.
So if I can finally get resolution on all this need to find another home, get power and water hooked up there, and somehow get back my belongings while I move from the thief’s yard to a more appropriate place for my existence, which by the way might include my even buying a place if I can pass muster with my post-bankruptcy low credit score and the type of abode conducive to my living there with my serious walking and standing, to say little of climbing stairs, impediments, and by the end of summer I might be living VERY differently from what I planned last fall. Keep your fingers crossed ;-)
And if you know of anybody with a suicide belt who wants a place to practice, contact me and I’ll tell you my lying, thieving, scheming, ingrate landlord’s address. ;-)